I think I’m a cat person.

sleepy kitty

People are okay.

Some days, I’d kill to be immersed in a crowd of people; other days, I want to be isolated from them. The only exception to solitude is Finn’s company.

His demands are simple: “take care of me” – nothing draining and exhausting like humans. Finn doesn’t live on my terms like dogs do for their owners. I love Finn because I like to love things for themselves; things that aren’t dependent on me.

We have daily routines, from waking up at a set time to snuggling for five minutes before we fall asleep. When a pattern falls out, it’s uncomfortable. This is the only stability I relish in my life. I think it’s where I find the small bit of stability I NEED.

sleeping finn

When Finn doesn’t come in for the night, I sleep terribly. I fear for his life and whether or not his needs are met. My cat allergies worsen during different seasons, so we occasionally shower before going to bed to reduce dander. I wonder if it strips his much-needed winter coat, I wonder if my showers are too hot/cold for his liking.

I’m paranoid he may be under or around the car when I pull out of the driveway, so I try to scout out Finn’s location while I walk to the car. I guard the garage door when we close it despite the sensors on each side; I usually come at his first cry or meow.

When I hold Finn as he purrs, and he holds eye contact with half-closed eyes, I know he’s a happy kitty. I know I’ve fulfilled his simple need, and it makes me love him more.



4 Comments

  1. Brenda wrote:

    I don’t want to litter up your beautiful amazing blog with shallow stray comments but does Finn really take showers with you? He actually likes water and doesn’t scratch you and run from the shower for dear life? This is fascinating to me. Did you train him to shower since he was a kitten? I love that your allergies have not stopped you from your love of cats. You are one of a kind in so many (good) ways!

    • Aw, no – I love any and all comments. Finn DOES shower with me, but it was a decision made after he turned one. Initially, he just froze up and stared at me like a maniac. Now, Finn lets me do my thing and sometimes sits outside the shower wanting back in after he’s let out. I could NEVER let my allergies stop me from snuggling with this guy – love him to death. Thank you!

  2. Cate wrote:

    I love my children more than deeply, and I love my husband too. But there aren’t words to describe the intense, primal comfort I take from my three cats and three dogs. During the night if I wake I reach out to see who’s there, and pet them. One of my cats sleeps under the covers, in my arms, and I stay in that position all night so as not to disturb him. Human + animal = better human.

    • “Human + animal = better human”.
      I love that SO-SO-SO-SO much.

      Finn and I have an amazing position arranged. It changes four times. I pet him on my chest for about 10mins until we’re almost out. Then I turn to my side and he sleeps on my neck/face. I move back onto my back and he’s snuggled between my neck and shoulder. Lastly, he gets a bit warm so he moves down between my legs on the comforter.